The Lawless and the Lawful
by Girl-Apart5
Summary: Inspired by the idea of Kariki Neroli and the art of Ptero LaNeuro from GaiaOnline and the Nicolae Fanthread. NicolaexLeon


Leon's day was, all things considered, pretty routine. He woke up at the crack of dawn, showered, dressed, then headed downstairs for some of his mother's homemade oatmeal, which had to be cut apart with a steak knife, then suited up in his armor before heading out.

After this, he informed his underlings what they would be doing that day, filed the reports he'd gone over and signed the night before, then checked in on the Guild Hall, which he volunteered at when he had free time. Upon seeing that all was well, there, he made his rounds of Barton, the Village Greens, and Towns. Routine, orderly, and satisfactory.

Of course, this wasn't always the case. More often than not, some disaster would strike Gaia, throwing the place into chaos and destruction, and his job would become very difficult indeed. Wars against zombies, aliens, vampires, towers falling, people going missing or turning into the previously stated creatures, and he didn't want to get into the mess that was the Olympics..

Still, these things passed fairly quickly, places were rebuilt, and peace resumed. All that was left was to wait for the next unholy occurrence to befall them.

"Beepbeep."

Leon repressed a sigh as he turned to one of the lower ranking Guards, William. The boy was competent in his duty, more so than some of the higher officials, even, but for some reason Leon didn't want to know, he insisted upon dressing and talking like a penguin of all things. It was frustrating, but by now, most of Barton was used to it, and even able to understand most of the high-pitched jabber.

"What is it, William?" Leon asked.

"Beepity beep. Beepers."

How curious.. "What do you mean, there's a strange carriage by the West Gate?"

"Beepity beepbeep." William pointed. "Beepbeep beep beep."

"You don't say.. Well, I'll go check it out. As you were." And with that, Leon clanked off to see what the penguin boy meant by a pipe-smoking pony.

When he arrived, he saw that indeed, under the shade of the trees by the West Gate leading to the Zen Gardens, was an elegant wagon beside which stood a black and white pony with a lit pipe sticking from it's mouth. Wondering what kind of freakish people the wind had blown into Barton this time, Leon walked up to the door and knocked.

The top half swung open, and standing behind it was a young man with wild, light brown hair with hints of auburn, silver-blue eyes, a green plaid cap, two gold hoop earrings, black leather jacket, open white shirt and shabby scarf. He had a long bit of straw between his teeth, and there was an odd sort of curve to his mouth that suggested he was the smirking type. Leon didn't like the glint in his eyes. Like a mischievous fox.

"Yes..?" The man drawled, those eyes roaming up and down Leon's armor with a curious expression.

Flustered by the casual and slightly irritated tone in the slightly accented voice, Leon's response came out a bit more gruff than he wanted it to.

"Who are you, and what are you doing here?"

The man's eyes refocused on Leon's. "Well.. I'm Nicolae, just a humble drifter looking for a place to sell my wares." The tone was innocent, but Leon saw right through it. He knew swindlers when he saw them.

"Do you have a permit?"

Nicolae rolled his eyes. "Of course I do. ..Ah..here." He fished around in his pockets a moment before handing over the papers.

Leon looked over them, hoping for traces of forgery, but to his disappointment, found none. But the absence of evidence, was not the evidence of absence.

"Fine, fine." He grumbled anyway, handing the paperwork back. "What are you selling?"

A grin spread over Nicolae's face. "Well, the answer to that is usually 'What do you want to buy?' but I get the feeling that you're far too sharp an individual for me to just try to peddle mere trinkets off on you."

So he was a charmer, too. Leon wanted to snort. This fool had no idea who he was dealing with. "I see. So what can you offer me, then?"

Again, that wily grin. "My good sir, do step inside.." And the lower part of the door opened, and Leon found himself being led into the small wagon that apparently served as both shop and home to the drifter.

Five minutes later, he walked back out wondering how he'd been convinced– no, no, _conned_ into buying a bunch of crap he had no uses for that cost more gold than he even knew he had on him at the time.

As he walked back to his post, he secretly vowed that no matter what, he would find a reason to drive that man as far from Barton as possible, or better yet, put him in shackles.

He may have been better off to just forget Nicolae altogether.

The next day, Gaia found itself once again thrown into chaos when inanimate objects suddenly became animated and vicious on top of it. Determined to keep Barton's side of things as under control as possible, Leon stationed himself in the Village Greens, doing his best to keep the Gnomes from getting to far in their plans of siege. He'd nearly forgotten about the drifter until the smooth Irish accent interrupted his train of thought.

"So how goes the brave battle of man against lawn ornament?"

Gritting his teeth, Leon turned to take in the smirking man standing there with his hands in his pockets like he owned the entire course.

But he had to set a good example. He couldn't let this infuriating person get the better of him. "We're keeping them at bay." He replied stiffly.

Nicolae nodded before their attention was pulled to a Gaian dressed all in gothic chains and belts with several large and lethal-looking weapons strapped to his person currently running past at full speed, crying and wailing at the top of his lungs while being

chased by a hoard of lawn gnomes. He ended up tripping over one of the chains, and was soon covered in the small, fiendishly giggling gnomes.

"Well..that's something you don't see every day.." Nicolae mused.

Leon huffed. "As you can obviously tell, this is no small matter. The gnomes are growing in numbers and strength and intelligence. It's only a matter of time before they try to enter Towns or Barton." He looked down at Nicolae, suddenly fully aware of his presence. "By the way.. Why are you here?"

The drifter shrugged. "Just looking around. Thought maybe there were some interesting things around here."

"Hm." Leon narrowed his eyes.

Giving the larger man a beaming, perfectly innocent smile, Nicolae saluted casually before sauntering over to the still sobbing Gaian, where he picked up one of the rarer items the poor soul had dropped.

Leon was about to intervene, certain that Nicolae was about to walk away with the expensive item. The gnomes hadn't yet noticed him, and were caught completely by surprise when Nicolae's boot suddenly swung out, catching one of them in the behind and sending it high into the air. The drifter made something of a show shading his eyes as he watched the gnome sail away across the course. Then he looked back down at the other gnomes, who were still in shock.

Nicolae grinned. "Who else wants to play?"

The lawn gnomes scuttled off muttering dark curses, but all the while glancing back anxiously at the scary human.

Looking victorious, Nicolae helped the mentally scarred Gaian up, handed him the item he'd taken, then walked back towards Barton, but not before flashing one last smirk towards Leon.

For a moment the Commander was stunned, then he realized what had happened. He'd been duped, once again, by the shady shop keeper. Putting on such an elaborate show just to get into Leon's good graces.. That scoundrel!

Growling under his breath, Leon glared daggers at the drifter's back until he was out of sight.

Commander Leon would not fall for these petty tricks! He knew better than to think that Nicolae had even a single decent bone in his body, and he would find a way to prove it.

A couple days later, Leon was once again averted from his struggle against the gnomes with news of the newcomer. This time it was about something being done by the fountain in Barton's main plaza. Not trusting anyone else to match wits with the scoundrel, Leon hurried over right away.

He didn't expect to find what he did.

Nicolae was sitting in the fountain, wearing only a pair of threadbare plaid boxers, the rest of his clothes floating around him as he rubbed shampoo into his hair.

For a moment Leon was stunned into silence. Then he was furious.

"What on earth do you think you're doing!?" He shouted.

Nicolae glanced up, again with perfect innocence.

"Ah, finished your pow wow with the gnomes, eh?" He asked.

Leon could feel his face heat up with impatience. "I asked you a question, ruffian. What do you think you're doing? This is public property!"

Nicolae poured a bucket of water over his head to wash the suds out before shaking like dog and effectively spraying Leon, who was now leaning on the edge of the fountain.

When he finished, he calmly answered the question. "I am bathing, as you can see. And washing my clothes, too. I won't attract very many customers smelling as bad as the armor you're wearing."

Leon sputtered. "My armor does not stink! It's fragrant with battle and smoked meats!"

"More like dead, rotting animals, if you ask me."

Struggling to keep his temper, Leon continued.

"Why are you bathing–"

"And washing my clothes."

"–Whatever. Why are you doing this in a public fountain?"

"Well, where else am I going to be able to get clean?" Now he grinned. "And besides, I've heard no complaints." He jerked his head towards a crowd of girls standing nearby who were giggling insanely.

Leon felt slightly ill. "That's..that's hardly relevant.."

Nicolae shrugged. "Well, as I don't really have a choice, I don't see how you can, in good conscience, punish me for simply trying to keep up with hygiene."

'As if he's one to talk about conscience.' Leon thought darkly. "Get the hell out of the fountain!"

"But I'm not done."

"Now!"

"I still have soap in my drawers.."

Thoroughly fed up, Leon reached over, grabbed Nicolae's arm, and proceeded to yank him from the fountain. Unfortunately for him, the crafty drifter had been expecting this, and was prepared.

Pressing his feet against the side of the fountain's base, he tugged back, and as Leon was already bent far over, the leverage was just enough to send them both tumbling into the water.

Coughing and sputtering, Leon managed to sit up as his clunky armor filled up with the cool water.

Grinning victoriously, Nicolae draped himself over Leon's chest. "There, you see? This isn't so bad. Why don't you join me and we can try to get the horrid smell out of your hair.."

Before the Guard could protest, Nicolae's nimble fingers were pulled off his armor and tossing the various pieces away from reach.

Leon had had just about enough of this. Feeling the urge to hit something, he tried to clamber from the fountain, only to have the horrible, insane, conniving drifter latch onto his waist.

"What in hell–" Leon began to snap, but when he looked down, his words left him at the beaming smile Nicolae was giving him. It was almost childish in it's... Well... "innocence" didn't fit, because there was absolutely nothing innocent about Nicolae. Leon really didn't want to describe it as "adorable", because that would be a compliment, but there really was no other word for it.

"But look," Nicolae said, again with the flawless innocence that could in no way actually be innocent at all. "Everyone thinks it's a great idea!" He nodded to the ever-growing group of girls who were all now shrieking their assent to whatever it was they thought the two were doing. "Besides, after all that time spent fighting lawn ornaments, you really do need to relax and cool off!" And with that, Nicolae began tugging off Leon's shirt.

"What the– Will you stop!? Dammit all– Let go of my pants, you idiot!!"

In the end, Leon managed to escape with the last bits of his pride. Sitting on the cobblestones next to the fountain that he would never be able to look at in the same way again, he pulled his wet shirt back on, all the while glaring daggers at the cheerfully grinning young man who was utilizing Leon's knee to re-tie his boots.

"Don't look so sour." Nicolae said as he made sure his hat was perfectly in place. "Don't you feel better now? Without all that heavy, hot, stinky armor.. You're clean, and cool, and you smell so much better now."

Huffing, Leon shoved Nicolae's foot away from him as he stood up. "You're under arrest."

"Hah?" Nicolae peered up at him curiously from where he was still in the middle of putting his shirt on.

"You heard me."

"But what did I do wrong?"

"I'll write you a list, now c'mon."

Nicolae sighed tragically. "Alright, then. If it makes you happy. May I at least put my clothes up to dry? I hate when they get all wrinkled.."

Leon rolled his eyes. He highly doubted someone of Nicolae's sort cared about such things. But then, the less complaining he had to deal with, the better. "Fine. Just make it quick. And don't even think about trying anything."

"You don't trust me.." The smaller man sniffed and somehow managed to keep his morose act flawless all the way back to his wagon.

"Might as well come inside." Nicolae sighed dejectedly when they arrived. "You're soaking wet.. I might have something you can change into.."

"Don't bother." Leon grunted. "Just hurry it up so I can lock _you_ up."

Continuing to watch the drifter like a hawk, the still damp commander sat down on the cot that apparently served as Nicolae's bed, hoping his armor wasn't going to rust up because of this whole mess.

His thoughts were cut short, however, when instead of hanging up his clothes, Nicolae was busily kicking off his boots and removing his shirt.

"Hey.." Leon grunted. "What're you doing? I'm going to haul you off to the dungeons no matter what, you know."

Before he could say anything else, however, he was stunned when, without warning, Nicolae crawled onto his lap, resting his arms upon the larger man's shoulders as the tips of their noses brushed against each other. Was it Leon imagination, or did his silver-blue eyes just flash gold?

"Don't be so mean.." Nicolae purred, any and all traces of somberness and innocence gone as though they'd never been there. "You're such a stiff, Leon.. Why don't you relax?"

"N-Nicolae–" Leon stuttered, but was cut off.

"Call me Nicu." And with that, the young drifter closed the rest of the gap between them with a passionate kiss.

Leon wasn't sure what was happening. How had he gotten into this situation? And most importantly, why wasn't he punching the scamming, scheming shop keeper into next year?

When Nicolae pulled away, he didn't give Leon a chance to recover his senses before he'd tugged the commander's shirt off again and then continued their kiss where he'd left off.

For a moment Leon remained still, his brain struggling to make sense of everything. The kiss, Nicolae's fingers buried in his hair, their damp chests pressed together.. Why wasn't he disgusted? Angry? Why wasn't he pushing Nicolae away?

While his mind remained in confusion, his body took off on it's own and before he realized he'd even moved, his arms were wrapped tight around Nicu and he was kissing back.

The wretched, conning, manipulating, dastardly fiend that was Nicolae had become, while only one of many obsessions Leon kept, the most addicting and dangerous of them all.

Not that Leon cared, at the moment.

He tightened his hold on the younger man and twisted until Nicu was pressed beneath him on the bed.

"Your clothes are going to get all wrinkly." Leon muttered snidely against Nicolae's neck.

"I like them that way." The drifter replied smugly as he took off his hat and tossed it onto the cluttered table.

It wasn't until later that night, once Leon had returned to his own home was drifting to sleep, that he remembered having told Nicolae he was going to arrest him.


End file.
